As I mentioned in another post, one of my favorite things about being an author is meeting incredible people who make this journey worthwhile. I keep (albeit loosely) in touch with one of these amazing humans on social media. Not too long ago she posted something that truly made my heart sing – for her.
She posted how she is choosing to be outwardly who she is inwardly.
Read that again.
She is choosing to express who she is inwardly to the world that exists around her, externally.
It takes courage to do this, especially if you are labeled by, well anyone. “Quirky,” “Off beat,” and let’s be blunt, “Weird” are labels too many of us have had super-glued onto us by those who refuse to open their minds to the complexity of simply being. And all too many of us work very hard to hide who we are. In a world where we wear visible masks in order to be in the company of others (covid), it’s ironic some of us wear yet another underneath.
We hide who we are.
We change our appearance to reflect not who we are inside, but whoever will be “accepted” or “tolerated” by those we must interact with.
And it is exhausting. Merely being in the presence of others often chips away at our sense of self-worth. It should not be this way. Yes, we can choose to have the courage to reflect our true selves to the world. But for some of us, it’s complicated stuff.
This blog is moving toward living authentically as its focus. The golden thread of Asperger’s – Autism will always run through it. But part of what I owe to this incredible community is to be authentic, myself.
Since writing “Asperger’s in Pink” much has changed; how we view Asperger’s (can we even call it that now?), how we talk about it (can we talk about it if we aren’t diagnosed, ourselves?), the much needed rise of female voices on the Spectrum, and more. Aside from Asperger’s, I have changed greatly, too. And it is hard being myself outwardly much of the time.
Why?
In part, I hesitated pouring life back into my blog because, in “Asperger’s in Pink,” I wrote quite a bit about the role faith played during the early years of raising K. I honestly do not want to discourage anyone who finds comfort in a particular faith while raising someone on the Spectrum. On another level, to be blunt, I also felt uncomfortable saying that what worked for me then doesn’t work quite as well as I once thought.
Moving forward I will continue to strive to live authentically. The Instagram post by the person (who happens to have Asperger’s) encouraged me to continue down this path. Because, as she put it, it feels so much better being truly who you are both inside and out.
I am thrilled to pieces for her! And I am also excited to join in the joy that knowing who you truly are and living authentically brings!
Will you join me?
Julie
(I did not include links to the Instagram I follow out of respect for privacy of this individual. This amazing person should not be trolled.)