Change and Pace

Change. One of those things we always seem to hear about. It’s welcome. It’s needed. It’s something we want to kick to the curb or ignore.

Pace. How fast we move. How fast – or slow – things move us.

Chatting over coffee after yoga class, my friend and I took a break from the chaos of life to simply catch up. Change is a constant theme of our conversations. This morning, it included finally being able to go from downward dog to walking our feet to the top of the mat – without falling over. That change is welcome and good.

Pace came into play, too. Her schedule allows for more classes; mine doesn’t. Unless I want to enter a “sleep-work-kinda sorta chug a meal down-yoga-sleep” cycle, I can’t go as often. Our pace differs. And that’s ok. And, like anything else in life, this, too, will eventually change.

Back when I wrote my first book, I had grand dreams of being a career author. That dream didn’t die; I discovered a lot of other things needed to happen on the way there. One of which is shifting genres and exhaling the courage needed to make such a shift.

Why am I bringing all that up? When I opened my dashboard this afternoon, I was stunned to realize the last blog post I published was almost a year ago.

Utterly gobsmacked.

Over the past few years I tried to find a workable balance between full-time non-writing work, writing work, and life. It would be easy to excuse this, saying “my day job” took up a lot of time, which it still does. (Kindly pardon me while I stand on my tattered soap box and lament the phrase “day job.” I really, really think that phrase should go the way of bell bottoms, saying “groovy”, and enforced gender roles. It also does a disservice to everyone working more than one job, which I have done. Work is work, no matter how many employers you have at any given time. And, yes, an employer can absolutely be yourself!) It would also be easy to blame-game, and tell me to admit the real problem is I should have given up the dream of publishing Book 2 a long time ago.

But that’s not my (longwinded) point.

I miss writing. I seem to say this yearly. But it is true. I find myself seeing stories when I turn down the hallway at work, stand in line, well, anywhere, and when I take time to breathe in the breath of nature.

Knowing all of this, over these past few years did the progress of my writing change? No – that’s part of the problem. I did not make writing a priority in anything other than my head.

Was the pace of my life lined up with my values, goals and commitments? Adapting to whatever life threw unexpectedly? Not really.

Looking back, I feel sad I did not put this priority, this love (writing) in action. It was all lip service. And last week, it really hit home.

It’s funny; I don’t talk about it publicly much at all, but I consistently take time to sling a a few cards and work with the themes that appear. Last week, the theme was crystal clear. See, I’m a nerd. I love to learn. I love to analyze. What I got was cold water in the middle of winter, in the form of two cards, pointing out how it is past time to move into life and do the work, put skin to stone, take in breath and exhale along with movement.

And DO life.

At coffee this morning, I mentioned this to my friend. She smiled. She knows me. I also told her this theme was repeated in yoga class at the end of last week.

Message received.

I won’t promise how frequent I will be back on here. That’s the best way for me to fail. What I will do is work to follow through. On the PDCA cycle (Plan Do Check Act) I recognize it’s time to DO. Past time. Instead of analyzing, again, how to best make it work, it is time to just “do the thing” and pivot if needed.

Which means blog posts will be sporadic. Content will be a bit rough as I dust off the writing skills that are turning to rust. But it’s ok.

As one of my yoga teachers says, “talk yourself into it, don’t talk yourself out of it.”

Change and pace. Balance. Harmony. Ebb. Flow.

Blessed be.


Doe in snow

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